As I was reading over the Miller's Blog and their web site, I came across what I thought was a very interesting assessment and one that I haven't given much thought to. It was stated that they worked very hard to accomplish what they've done (as is very evident). Although they worked hard to get where they are, it wasn't always necessarily something they wanted to do. But - their parents thought it was important, and they were not allowed to quit. In doing this, they were able to develop good attitudes about unpleasant situations or circumstances.
Of course there are always things that have to be done that we don't necessarily enjoying doing, even as adults, but if we're trained to persevere even when we don't "feel" like it, I can definitely see how that can help with having the right attitude.
After reading that, I thought, "How often have I wanted my children to accomplish something but after receiving their input didn't encourage them to continue?"
I'm talking about things on a bigger spectrum. If I tell them to go clean their room and they say they really don't want to, I don't say, "Okay, whatever you think." No Way! They have to clean their room whether they feel like it or not. Also, whenever we "sign them up" for something, we have for the most part made them continue to the end whether they were truly enjoying it or not. There may have been a time or two when this wasn't the case. The main reason we have for allowing an activity to stop is in the case of bad influences, which hasn't been often.
But, there have been times when I've had ideas for things I would like my children to do, but knowing that the cost and difficulty involved might be more than what they've been used to, I've backed down. Sometimes I think that we as parents realize it's going to be a lot of work on us also - if not more, and that makes it a little easier to not push our children. Sometimes maybe I'm a little relieved when they don't want to do something as it takes the pressure off of me!
I appreciate the lesson I've learned (hopefully - time will tell if it was actually learned) by reading what they had to say about this. I'm going to start on a smaller scale by getting back to those cross-stitch projects we started before Christmas! A little bit of frustration was all it took to stick those in the drawer. I think it's time to pull them back out.